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  • Writer's pictureShannon Duskie

First Love Yourself

It was the first church service that we attended as a new family of four. Almost two months later, I'm still thinking about part of the message. All I remember was the priest saying - “Jesus calls us to love others as we love ourselves.”

My brain started wondering.

Jesus calls us to LOVE OTHERS as we LOVE OURSELVES. But what happens when we don’t love ourselves? Can we only love others to the capacity that we love ourselves?

I needed a visual.

Often we think that putting others before ourselves is the best way to love other people. But is it actually a form of distraction? Taking the focus off of ourselves because we are unhappy? Unhappy with the way we feel, the way we look, the way we are living our life? Are we living in fear or hate so instead of slowing down and dealing with our own shit, we focus on anything or anyone else?

The thing is - I really think that in today’s world, we have to learn to love ourselves correctly. Living in a world of busyness and constant comparison can make us think that loving ourselves means letting loose and drinking too much, vegging out all weekend watching Netflix or buying something fancy. It’s not that these things are bad - but is it still a form of distraction when you REALLY think about it? Drinking and vegging out to numb the pain or distract ourselves once again from any real issues? Buying something for an instant gratification until we see the missing money in our bank account and realize weeks later, that this thing really didn’t increase our happiness?

Not everyone’s self-loving practices are going to be the same, but it’s completely true that some form of exercise and some type of healthy nutrition is good for all of us. The same is true for therapy, ya’ll!

So many of us have gone through most of our lives with a distorted idea of what self-love actually is. So do you think it’s easy to change those habits? Hell-to-the-no! And let’s be real - even if you have good self-love habits, it’s never easy to go to therapy. That’s why it’s SO IMPORTANT to surround yourself with amazing humans who are constantly pushing to love themselves first. To surround yourself with a tribe that knows what healthy self-love habits are and who are moving toward the right end of the spectrum.

Where do you find these so-called people to surround yourself with? Right here, my friend! TRIBE F.L.Y. (First Love Yourself) is a community of women who are dedicated to loving themselves first. It’s a place to reach out when you’re struggling - to be encouraged and sometimes just to find the right sports bra! It’s a place to go to celebrate your wins (big or small) and gain new ideas on how you can love yourself better! It’s a community that IF you allow yourself to be apart of it, you will inspire others and be inspired to FIRST LOVE YOURSELF.

Mark 12:31 You shall love your neighbor as yourself. There is no other commandment greater than these.

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