Choose Beauty

Saturday was beautiful!! Fulfilling in every way and full of love.

Sam and I spent the morning playing and getting the house in order. He helped me with the laundry and we put fresh sheets on the bed. We ate fruit snacks and played with blocks. As we sat on the floor, driving trucks and tractors around the blocks, he'd run up to me and give me a big hug and when I asked for a kiss, he planted a big one on me, followed by a burst of giggles!! It made my heart so happy because usually bedtime is the only time he'll give me kisses! Any other time I get a "No Mom!".

It was in that moment that I thought to myself, if this would've happened yesterday, would I even have seen it? enjoyed it? loved it? seen the beauty in it?

Determined to get out of the house for some fun, we loaded up and headed to Beloit. I was so pleasantly surprised that it wasn't rainy and yucky yet. Taking full advantage of the beautiful spring weather, Bailie, Aven, Sam and I spent all of our time together outside! We went for a walk. First to the hardware store and then around town a bit. We had a pizza picnic on the front porch. We went to the park where the kids (ourselves included) ran around, weaving in and out of the poles underneath the playground equipment playing tag, slid down the slides together and swung back and forth saying "wheeeee". In the midst of all the play, Bailie and I caught up on life. As 1:00 rolled around, it was clear that the kids (again, ourselves included) were all ready for naps! I peeled Sam away from the pink tricycle that he had a death grip on and strapped him in his car seat while he screamed bloody murder. We were barely out of town before he was sleeping! We parked the car outside the house, sleepily shuffled in and both napped until about 3 O'clock.

I thought our next adventure for the day could be to go play with Grandma Jill & Grandpa Steve, but since they were headed to church soon, we invited ourselves to go with them!! We got dressed and they picked us up - a much better option that trying to do it alone tomorrow morning! Jill led the way in, sitting toward the front right of the church - the usual spot. Everyone has a preferred usual spot at church, right? We are all right sided people! Sam played cars, read books and ate more fruit snack as he shuffled back and forth between Jill, Steve and I.

As we left church, it was sunny and rainy. Sunny and rainy is my FAVORITE because it just doesn't make sense and so rarely happens!! We headed east back to Cawker City admiring the rainbows the entire way!! Jill said out loud what we were all thinking - "Thank you Lord for showing us these beautiful rainbows!"

I spent most of the evening over at my in-laws eating homemade pizza and watching Sam play with his uncle Mason.

Circling back to this thought - If this would've happened yesterday, would I even have seen it? enjoyed it? loved it? seen the beauty in it?

You see - Friday was most likely just as beautiful, but I wasn't open to its beauty. I chose to believe that there wasn't anything fun for me and Sam to do. I chose not to show up for myself or for him. Instead I allowed the TV to be the main source of entertainment for the both of us. I piddled around the house cleaning up here and there thinking that would make me feel somewhat accomplished and got easily annoyed when he simply wanted my attention. It makes me sad just thinking about it. I know we all have those days sometimes and I know I can't go back and change it. But now that I see it, I can recognize when it's happening again and choose my path.

Will I wallow? Or will I CHOOSE to be open to all of the love and happiness the day brings?